Why I know I am a child of God

A winters day
In a deep and dark December;
I am alone,
Gazing from my window to the streets below
On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow.
I am a rock,
I am an island.
I’ve built walls,
A fortress deep and mighty,
That none may penetrate.
I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain.
Its laughter and its loving I disdain.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

Don’t talk of love,
But I’ve heard the words before;
It’s sleeping in my memory.
I wont disturb the slumber of feelings that have died.
If I never loved I never would have cried.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.
I am a rock,
I am an island.

And a rock feels no pain;
And an island never cries.

-Paul Simon and Art Garfunkel

I have always loved this song. When I was young I wondered what it would be like to feel as this person in the song does, making oneself completely isolated from the world.

Today I have had this song running in my head. Potty training stinks. Cleaning up pee stinks. Getting your baby to take naps on his own stinks. Weaning your baby, who really likes to nurse, stinks. Stepping on Transformers and Legos stinks. Loosing your patience over and over and over again really stinks.

Finally, I have a moment for myself, to process my anger and impatience, and this song is going through my head.

So again, I think about what it would be like to be completely void of human relationships and interaction. What would bring a person to feel like this was a positive alternative to life?

Today I wished I was alone. It’s less messy, it’s quieter, and it’s certainly easier to only worry about my own welfare and Love only myself.

Relationships are hard, every single one I have ever had required a lot of work. The ones that are really worthwhile, even eternal, are the hardest and require the most attention. Sometimes my efforts are rewarded, and sometimes I find myself cleaning up pee, literally and figuratively.

Then I think to myself, the one relationship that is ALWAYS rewarding to me is my relationship with my Father in Heaven. The times in my life when I have chosen to nourish this relationship, I have found myself happier. The circumstances around me have not changed; I’m sure there will always be pee to clean up. (Literally and figuratively) But I can now look at my life with a different perspective. Heavenly Father is aware of me.

This is a lesson that I have been learning for awhile.
I’m quite certain the tutelage will continue in 2009.
And for the rest of my mortal life.
I’m OK with that, because I know I am a daughter of God.
Now I have been reminded of that and I feel much better.

Happy New Year.

Naughty or Nigh?

Merry Christmas from the Jacobs Family!



Yes, Ian is on the potty. No Apologies, we spend a lot of time there!

And one more...

Mt. Vesuvius

When Gabe was about 5 months old, we were visiting some of our family.
During this visit I entered the master bedroom with the lady of the house. (let's just call her "Jembee")

There resting on her lovely queen-sized bed was something that resembled this:



It was all clean laundry, not folded, just mounted in a heap on the bed.
Forgive me Jembee, but to myself I thought, "How does one knowingly let the clean laundry pile up like that?"

Fast forward 4 years. I now find myself with three young boys, who are particularly messy if I do say so. My husband is particularly clean, which means he frequently changes his clothes that become dirty because of our messy boys. I usually hang out in what some may call "grubbies" because I know that if I change the next thing will just get dirty and then I will be the one washing all those dirty shirts. Gross I know, but it's survival.

The phrase, "compelled to be humble" comes to mind.

Just in case you didn't get the full scope of my clean laundry pile, here are two more pictures from different angles.





Eventually the laundry was all folded, some of it put away, the rest still waiting on the bed there to annoy me and Nick so we have to put it away before we can sleep. Jembee, I am a changed woman! I will now bow at your feet and worship.

Oh, and Gabe helped me fold! He's a good egg that one...

Thanksgiving sentiments...

I am feeling sentimental tonight; I would like to share with you Six things that I am most thankful for (in no particular order).

My marriage

I am so thankful for the marriage that Nick and I share. I am truly happy to be his wife through the good and the bad. Quite frankly I am thankful for the bad, because we have worked through it together and become closer because of it. Bring on the Bad! I look forward to an eternity of good and bad and even sometimes quite perfect with him.
Which brings me too…

My Temple Covenants

Where would I be without them? I shudder at the thought. I am thankful that through these covenants I am sealed to my family, immediate and extended. I am thankful that my Heavenly Father is willing to make personal covenants with me, little old me! I am thankful I can commune with my Heavenly Father in his house and learn more about my covenants. More specifically I am thankful for the proximity of the Bountiful Temple up on the mountain. It is like a beacon of hope for me on many days, it reminds me what matters most.
Which brings me too…

Gabe

Where do I begin? This boy lights up my life. I love his stream of questions, his vibrant energy, his desire to do good and be kind. There is no doubt in my mind that Gabe was meant to be the eldest boy in our family, he has a beautiful spirit!
Which brings me too…

Ian

From the day Ian was born he has been content. He wants nothing more than to be happy and make others around him happy. This manifests itself in many ways, which always keeps things around our house fresh! Ian is so silly, so happy, so loving. He is eager to learn and do everything that his older brother does and loves to give his baby hugs.
Which brings me too…

Simon

Last but certainly not least, our baby Simon. He is now 9 months old and can’t wait to crawl and bounce around the house with his brothers. Simon is rarely seen without a smile. He is a beautiful, sweet, loving baby. He gives the best hugs, especially in the middle of the night. Sometimes I think if he could speak he would have wonderful things to tell me, soon enough he will.

Let me not forget my wonderful family and friends. I love you all, you have no idea how each of you enrich my life on a daily basis. I have learned so much from all of you, and look forward to the moments when we are together. Thank-you for your love and friendship!

So there is my Thanksgiving bounty. I know that each of you who may read this blog have as much if not more to be thankful about.
It feels so concrete when you put it on paper (or E-paper), you might do it too!
Happy Thanksgiving!

Tiny Awkward Ninjas

Ok, let me give a little background on this post. Nick has been involved with a campaign at work for Western Family products, the generic food brand carried at Associated Food Stores. Their most recent ad campaign has consisted of 13 "webisodes"about a fictional Western Family that they shot over the summer. Side note: the jingle for the webisode was written and preformed by Nick and his buddy at work JR.
Anyway, the last webisode, episode 13, ended in a cliffhanger because Western Family is running a contest for people to submit their own videos of what happens next. The contest has two categories, one for employees of Western Family and AFS with a prize of $500, another for the general public with a prize of $1000. Nick and JR wrote this awesome webisode and we shot it a couple of Saturdays ago. Win or not, we had a lot of fun doing it and even more fun watching it completed!

First click HERE to watch the 13th episode that AFS made (it will help you understand our webisode a lot more!)

Then click HERE to see our FABULOUS webisode!


The Cast Includes:
Nick as Grant and Mamasahn
JR as Papasahn
Emily as Kathy
Sherrie (JR's wife) as Meghan
Gabe as Bob (who is Japanese) and Tiny Awkward Ninja #1
Ian as Tiny Awkward Ninja #2

Enjoy!

Dialogue between Ian and Gabe

In an effort to get some time to vacuum my family room floor and start dinner, I turned on a movie for the boys. Ian picked out The Little Mermaid. Here is the conversation that occurred while I was getting the DVD turned on.
Gabe: Ian, you'll have to keep an eye on me.
Ian : (says nothing, patiently waiting for movie to start)
Gabe: This movie is a little scary for me so you'll have to keep your eye on me.
Ian: It's just a movie Dabe. (translation = Gabe)
Gabe: It's a little scary, will you just hug me while we watch it?
Ian: It's not scary Dabe.

The movie has now begun and I look over to find Gabe curled up right next to Ian, obviously in need of a little comfort for this scary show. I wonder where he gets it?

Halloweenies!

So here are some pics from Nick's team at work. If you couldn't tell, their theme was Harry Potter, I'll leave it up to you to guess who Nick is dressed as.



They came in 2nd place in the company-wide contest. Oh well, there's always next year!



Here are some favorite pictures from our ward trunk-or-treat as well as from Halloween night. Yes, we did trick-or-treat despite the Chicken Pox, we just made sure to try not to breathe on anyone and only went to houses without little kids. Hope you had a good Holiday at your house.